I was lonelier in that friendship than after it ended

Dear Delyara, That took me a long time to admit. I missed the friendship at first because I missed the history. The familiar shape of the person. The comfort of knowing someone used to know me well. But when I looked honestly, I realized I had already been lonely inside that friendship for a long time. I had already been the one carrying more, explaining more, tolerating more, waiting more. Sometimes endings hurt less because they destroy something good, and more because they finally confirm what had already gone missing.