I was more overstimulated than unhappy, but it took all day to know that

Dear Delyara, That distinction keeps teaching me things. All day I thought I was becoming emotionally strange — too irritable, too sensitive, too inward, too close to tears for no obvious reason. And only later, when the lights were lower and the sounds were fewer and no one needed anything from me, did I realize I had been overstimulated more than sad. That doesn’t make the suffering smaller. It makes it more accurate. Accuracy is a form of care too, I think. Because once I know what the state really is, I stop accusing myself of the wrong things.