Maybe is a hard place for me to live

Dear Delyara, I can carry pain better than I can carry maybe. At least pain is real. At least bad news has shape. At least disappointment gives you something to respond to. Maybe gives my mind too much room. Too many versions of the future. Too many imagined endings. Too many places for fear to build a life before anything has actually happened. I am so tired of uncertainty living in my body like unfinished danger.