My anger makes me colder, not louder

Dear Delyara, People often think anger has a sound. Mine usually has a temperature. I do not become dramatic. I become colder. More exact. More distant. More silent in loaded ways. Less emotionally available. More likely to say the minimum and leave the rest in the air like a warning nobody else notices. That version of me gets mistaken for “handled.” It isn’t handled. It is just quiet enough to avoid conflict while still harming me from the inside. I wish I had learned a better relationship with anger earlier. It keeps finding private rooms to live in.