My daughter wanted me to watch the same video twice

Dear Delyara, The first time was sweet. The second time, if I’m honest, required character. It was one of those little clips children find endlessly funny, and she wanted the full reaction both times. Not just presence. Performance. Laugh here, notice this, say that bit was your favourite. I could feel myself resisting inside because I had already used up so much of my available energy on being appropriately responsive all day long. Still, I watched it again. That is one of the quieter forms of love, I think. Not the grand sacrifices. The repeated attention you offer when your inner world would rather go still. The little second showing. The patient face. The decision not to make a child pay for the fact that the adult in front of them is overstimulated and low on sparkle. I managed it. Barely. That also feels true.