My friend keeps borrowing my grief

Dear Delyara, My husband died last year, and my closest friend has begun telling people his death changed her life. She posts photographs of him, writes long messages on anniversaries, and speaks about “our loss” to people who barely knew us. At first, I was grateful she remembered him. Now I feel as though she is using my grief to become deeper, kinder, more interesting in public. Last week, she posted a photograph from our wedding without asking. People commented on how beautiful their friendship had been. I was cropped out. When I told her the post hurt me, she cried and said I was policing how she grieved. Perhaps I am. She did love him. She also goes home to her living husband after every memorial dinner. I return to the house where his shoes are still under the bed. I do not want to rank pain. I also do not want my marriage turned into someone else’s public tragedy while I am still struggling to survive it privately.