My husband has stopped asking me to come to bed

Dear Delyara, For months, I have slept on the sofa more often than in our bed. At first, it was because our baby woke constantly and I did not want to disturb my husband before work. Then the baby began sleeping, and I kept finding reasons: television, back pain, paperwork, falling asleep accidentally. My husband used to come downstairs around midnight and say, “Come to bed.” Sometimes he carried my blanket upstairs. Last night, I realized he has stopped asking. He kissed my forehead at ten and said, “Goodnight,” as though the sofa had officially become my room. I wanted him to fight for me then, which is unfair because I am the one who kept refusing. Since the baby was born, I do not recognize myself sexually. I feel touched all day, needed all day, and by evening even his gentle hand can feel like another request my body must answer. I have never told him that. Instead, I kept saying I was tired until tired became architecture. Tonight, he is asleep upstairs. I am on the sofa again, wide awake, listening to the baby monitor and wondering at what point a temporary place to rest became the distance between two people who still say “love you” every morning.