My husband wants sex to prove we are okay

Dear Delyara, We lost our baby six months ago. Since then, my husband reaches for sex when he feels frightened about us. I pull away because pregnancy, blood, hospitals, and my body have become tangled together. He says he misses me. I say I miss myself. Last night, he asked whether I still love him because we have not had sex in nearly three months. I became furious. Then he cried. That frightened me more because my husband almost never cries. He said sex is the only time lately when he believes we might still be a couple instead of two people grieving in different rooms. I understand now, but understanding does not make my body ready. When he touches my stomach, I remember the ultrasound. When he kisses my neck, part of me is already preparing to disappoint him. We are kind to each other all day and lonely beside each other at night. I do not know how long a marriage can survive two people using the same bed to prove opposite things.