My Prayers Got Smaller and Truer

Dear Delyara, I used to pray like I was presenting a case. Long sentences. Careful language. A strange need to sound composed even in private. As if God would love me more if I was articulate. Lately my prayers have changed. Now sometimes all I say is: Please help me not to panic. Please let me make it through today. Please stay. And somehow those small prayers feel more alive than the polished ones ever did. My spiritual growth has not made me more certain. It has made me more honest. I am less interested now in performing faith and more interested in practicing trust. That is harder than it sounds. And much more real.