Some friendships now feel like maintenance, not rest

Dear Delyara, There were friendships that once felt easy, alive, mutually warm in a way that gave something back to both people. Now, with one or two of them, I can feel the effort in myself. The right tone. The right amount of warmth. The follow-up. The carrying. The keeping it alive because history still exists even when ease has thinned. I don’t think every friendship has to feel effortless all the time. But when it starts feeling mostly like maintenance, something important has changed. What hurts is how long I can stay loyal to a shape after the life inside it has already started leaking out.