Some pain made me less noble than I wanted to be

Dear Delyara, I wish suffering always made people wiser first. It doesn’t. There have been times when pain made me colder, harder, more bitter than I like to admit. Not forever. Not as a full identity. But enough that I have to be honest about it. Some injuries do not produce immediate grace. They produce a darkness that has to be worked through slowly, and not always beautifully. I think part of healing is admitting that pain did not make you noble the whole way through. Sometimes it made you human in less flattering ways first. That is true of me.