Staring at the New Watch on My Wrist and Feeling the Utter Emptiness of It

Dear Delyara, I bought myself an expensive watch today to celebrate hitting a financial milestone I’ve been aiming for since my twenties. It’s a beautiful piece of engineering—heavy silver, sapphire glass, a perfect mechanical movement. I sat in my car looking at it on my wrist, waiting for that rush of satisfaction and pride I’d promised myself I would feel. Nothing came. Just a cold, flat silence that felt like a mockery. I’ve sacrificed my relationships, my hobbies, and my health to hit these corporate markers, completely convinced that financial success would finally make me feel secure and complete. Instead, I’m just the exact same lonely, anxious person I’ve always been, only now I have an expensive way to count the minutes I’m wasting.