We still share a kitchen after the divorce

Dear Delyara, My ex-husband and I are divorced but still living in the same house because neither of us can afford to buy the other out and renting separately would destroy us financially. We have separate bedrooms and shelves in the refrigerator. We use a calendar for kitchen time when things are bad. Last month, he started dating someone. She came to the house for the first time yesterday. I heard them laughing downstairs while I sat in the bedroom we used to share. I have also dated since the divorce, so I have no moral claim to jealousy. Still, hearing another woman open my kitchen cupboards without asking made something inside me twist. This morning, her coffee mug was in the sink. I washed it because leaving it there felt childish. Then I became furious that I was washing a stranger’s lipstick from a cup in the house where my marriage ended but apparently cannot physically finish. Our children say we are handling the divorce maturely. They do not see us labeling milk. I thought divorce meant separating lives. We have separated legally while sharing the toaster.